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Post by Professor Dia Hubbles on Apr 1, 2007 14:17:16 GMT
Dia decided not to say anything but rather to let her actions be her answer. They were so close already that she didn't have to move much to once again be kissing Fitz. She moved her lips onto his and stool on her toes.
She shut her eyes and wrapped her arms around his neck. She pulled him in tight so that he couldn't get away ever again. She hoped that this would make everything clear. She wanted nothing more then to be with him and she hoped that he understood that now.
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Post by Fitz Hargreaves on Apr 1, 2007 14:38:04 GMT
Dia had an infuriating way of doing precisely the right thing to set him on edge, without answering his questions he had no way of knowing how she truly felt. A part of him desired only to be locked in the embrace until the end of time, another wished to be free. Even as the kiss began, though it was a passionate one, all he saw was chains tightening upon him, he was afraid oh so frightened of being tied down, not being his own man, he needed to make his own decisions without any persuasion or distractions. His writings required pure focus yet now he was star struck. Try as he might his judgements and necessity of being focused was lost.
Such a circumstance sparked off his writings, it was precisely the boost he needed for his writings, but he thought nothing of it, only a fleeting thought. With her he was at total peace desiring the only writing of such poems and songs to win her heart, but no he needed to remain a steadfast irreputable writer, but the love was all conquering.
Yet still he was the one to break the kiss and embrace first, gently prying her lips from his and arms from the encirclement.
"I've not changed much Illy, I want you to know what you're getting into, I don't want you to regret this one jot." He looked pleadingly into her eyes willing her to believe his sincerity and strength of feeling still.
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Post by Professor Dia Hubbles on Apr 10, 2007 0:00:34 GMT
A jot? she thought, isn't this what he wants? Isn't this what he's always wanted? Dia, feeling a little embarrassed now, retracted her arms from Fitz without much encouragement. She let her arms hand by her sides as she stared at Fiitz.
As much as he denied it, he had changed. She began to think about what this would mean. The thought of actually spending time with Fitz without trying to berate him, seemed impossible. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and looked at the floor. She knew what she had to do but was uncertain of how she was to do it.
She picked her words carefully, so spoke slowly, "Fitz," she began, "as this dream is wonderful but you know as well as I that we could not ... work. You need your space to do what you do ... as much as I want and need the same ... as much as it can be afforded.
"I thank you for showing this that you have, but now I must leave you, standing, single and free of any other attachments that may linger between us. We never were, Fitz, and will never be. I loved you once, and do still but now I can walk away, happy and free. I wish you all the best in you work. And Peace be with you."
She gave Fitz a final kiss on the cheek, curtsied then turned. Dia blinked away tears and continued down the corridor. What a whirl wind of emotions that had been experienced in such a short time and to finally leave with nothing gained but many years of sorrow lost. It seemed a fair enough trade but then why did she feel so hopelessly lost ...
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Post by Fitz Hargreaves on Apr 11, 2007 10:38:00 GMT
That hadn't been the plan, the love of his life was walking away, slipping through his fingers as easily and swiflty as sand. why am I tormenting us so? I love her, I can't just let her go like that..
"peace be with me," he murmered shocked to the core; is that it? Whilst she had spoken so gently he had been soothed by her voice and kidnly features, but without her there with him, there would be nothing in the world to comfort him, not even his own skill at writing.
"It can and will work!" He shouted out his voice pained and eyes full of sorrow and anguish, he wouldn't let her escape so easily.He felt strangley like a schoolboy, perhaps he was acting in such a foolish fashion too, unsure of his strength of feeling, pride pricked and stopping him from moving onwards, yet Dia seemed so sure about this.
He stood transfixed as if she had cast a spell upon him, or weaved an elaborate web, he was caught fast, unresisting, his legs wouldn't move to catch her, did a small part of him know the futility of it? Urging his legs to move he still stood rooted to the spot, only his branches reaching towards the light, the light that was his beloved Illy.
"Don't go," he called mournfully, sadness and the futility of the situation dragging him down into an abyss of sadness.
But the abysm of hell conjured up a fire in his blood too, one he wouldn't release to dispell all he had managed so far; an anger at himself grew, why was he acting so strangely? Why did she have such an adverse affect upon him? Never before and never again would anybody have such a control over him; yet she didn't use it.
With pain rising in his gullet he steeled himself, clenching his fists, keeping back the tears without much strength of will required. I'll just devote myself to my all absorbing work, she'll soon be forgotten he tried in vain to reassure himself. A single tear slid down his cheek dodging his defences as he thought glumly
I have to be strong.
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